Tuesday 7 May 2019

Ramadan 2019/1440: Thought of the Day 2

The second thought of the day from my box of things to think about was the following quote:

“Sometimes sabr and silence is better than expressing how you really feel”

I haven’t been able to find the source of this quote, but I can imagine a range of reactions to this:
The belief that we should stand up for ourselves.
That we should stand up for what is right.
That we are allowing ourselves to be doormats or bullies.

A former, fiery version of myself would have agreed with all of the above and launched into the fray – responding to a hurt, defending myself or arguing my case.  But one thing I have learned over time is the power, impact and wisdom of silence.

The quote made me think of a saying close to my heart: “I often regret that I have spoken; never that I have been silent” (variously attributed to Publilius Syrus, Xenocrates and others). I agree with this so many times over.  The times when I held my tongue and it turned out to be the right thing to do.

Even more, as a chatterbox, when I am quiet it makes my family uncomfortable – there is real power in staying silent and leaving others to fill the quiet rather than rushing to fill it with your chatter.

As for sabr, this is an art I am still learning, whether from my husband’s love, patience and good example, my mum and in-laws discomfort as they get older, or my teenagers wisdom and nonsense that tests me often.

"He utters not a word but that a vigilant guardian is at hand" ~ Quran 50:18

The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said: "Verily, a man sometime utters a good word that pleases Allah, unaware of how highly it will be rewarded, and on its account Allah decrees His Pleasure of him until the Day he meets Him. Similarly, a man might utter a word that angers Allah, unaware of how dreadful its punishment will be, and on its account Allah decrees for him His anger until the Day he meets Him (Uthmani, pg. 160)."

The Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said: "He who maintains silence has attained salvation" (Ahmed and Tirmidhi)

The Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said: "‘Whoever believe in Allah and the Last Day, let him say what is good or remain silent.’" (Bukhari and Muslim)

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