Wednesday 26 September 2007

Happy Mama Feeling a Bit Left Out.

One of the reasons I started this blog was to see if there were other women in a similar position to me out there (other reasons include I’m a bit of a show-off astaghfirullah and also that I was inspired by the likes of the wonderful Sunni Sister, Umar Lee, Writeous Sister Speaks, Precious Modesty and Indigo Jo Blogs – whose blogs are far more cerebral and important than this one mashallah). Anyway, I find my situation a bit unique. I don’t quite fit in with the school-run mums because they all see each other every day, whereas I see them occasionally, although a few have been lovely and very friendly and made things easier for me because of this.

All the young hijabi mums mostly do not work and many are very judgemental when they find that you do work, often more-so the ones born and raised here, many of whom are very well educated (these are often the mothers who home-school, organise Muslim play-groups and run sisters circles. I am in awe of them and to be honest a little bit fearful of them sometimes, expecting to be told off for something). The ones from “back home” (India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Somalia etc – this is a very mixed neighbourhood) are often surprised that I work and some are honest enough to say that they wish they had the time/nerve/English to go back to school or get a job.

The people my age at work (and in general) don’t have kids, home, husband, in-laws etc to contend with (alhamdulillah) and so often I feel that I do not have a lot in common with them, especially when many people my age are most concerned with music, I-pods, trainers, the latest skin-flick or drinking and clubbing (muslim or not) which kind of don’t interest me (at all). Most of the working mums here are quite a bit older and just want to do they’re days work and head out first chance they get. All of my closest friends are just getting married or have not had a child yet except one, who every time we see each other smile knowingly whilst we drag along our shopping and kids. I know there are sisters out there like me: teachers, public servants, office workers, doctors and lawyers and allsorts else. I hope this blog can, amongst other things, be a medium for me to learn from them and be inspired by them.


  1. As Salaamu Alaikum Sis:

    Hang in there; as you become known in the Muslim blogsphere, you will meet many professional Muslimahs, and sisters with interests/situations similar to yours.

    I don't understand why some sisters judge Muslimahs who want to work, even if they have children. Many of the Sahabiyyat (spelling/yuk) worked in various professions.

    Keep blogging!

    1. Many of the Sahabiyyat worked in various professions.
      Really, Mam. Can you name just one sahabiyyah who went out of home to work without an emergency, flouting Allah's command:
      وَقَرْنَ فِي بُيُوتِكُنَّ
      Stay put inside your homes. (Quran 33:33)

      Please don't get deluded by people who scan the Islamic texts to legitimise the European culture, and when they fail to find a supporting text, they just invent one.

    2. Anonymous21 July, 2015

      Why do men insist on controlling women through twisting Islam?

  2. Aslamu alakum sister
    you are doing a grat job ,Allah blesses us all differently and we are skilled differently, I have a uni education but choose to say at home and raise the kids full time and this is a job and a half, ofcourse we all feel our lives are incomplete at one time or the other and i too wished sometimes i had persued a carer but allah had other plans for me. Don't feel left out sister, hunt out the siters circle for you, there are cirlces org by the East London Masjid for professional sisters to suit out of work hours , worth a call to check it out!!!

    When i first became a muslimah i was very isolated and alone for many years 5-6 i strove to hunt out good sisters and role models and established halaqh's and gatherings ect where there is a will there is a way. your doing a great job sister and your roles is equally important as any other housewife, mother home educator, at the end of the day we are accountable to Allah for ourselves and our flock, may Allah bless you sister.

  3. Anonymous02 May, 2012


    i really like ur blog... i came through it when i was googlin moms guilt.. i have 3 kids 5 and under youngest is 2 months Alhamdulilah but life sometime (or mostly gets challenging)..n i always have the guilt tht i m not givin my kids the trainin i wanna give them islamically etc... i did get lot inspired by ur posts as they r preety realistic n fun to read... carry on