Sunday 30 January 2011

Searching for that Flow

I had this last Friday off and had planned to blog, write my pieces for Mum and Muslim and answer e-mails whilst the kids were at school. I am terrible though for spending my time doing what seems pressing rather than what is actually important. So I spent the day cleaning the house from top to bottom, cooking and trying to engage in my Friday worship at an unhurried pace. Although I did get a cooking lesson in from the Aunty who lives with us, we made aubergine curry with strained yoghurt – delicious.

Once the kids were back home I had to give up on any thoughts of writing (I went to pick up Gorgeous from nursery and I could hear his teacher asking him “who’s that then?” very jovially, but I think she actually meant it. She sees me so rarely she never recognises me).

I tried again Saturday and managed to write a few articles for Mum and Muslim, but I don’t think mum’s couch is the best place as I get lazy and eat too much and concentrate too little.

This morning would have been the perfect time, but I decided to be kind to myself and catch up on my sleep. Sunday’s we have a Sisters circle from 2-3pm, so this gives me a deadline to get my act together and clean the house, get everyone fed and get the Zoher (midday) prayer in on time. Alhamdlillah the Sister’s circle has started to get better-attended. We used to have four or five sisters attend regularly, but the support from the men at the masjid who have helped spread the word and encouraged their wives to attend as well as in many cases mind the children for an hour. The last two weeks and today there were approximately 12-15 sisters (and still numerous children) but I felt very inspired and refreshed at the end of the hour Alhamdulillah and there were suggestions that from next week we will split off into two groups so we can conduct study circles in Urdu and English so that no-one is left out.

I needed a break after that (notice – still no writing going on) and was craving sugar. I had also promised to get someone some black seed oil to try on their husband’s balding scalp (I’ll let you know if it works), so took the kids to the Islamic shop nearby. Never a good idea. I always go crazy when I go near the books. There was also a sale on.....

You would think with this lot, that I would refrain from adding any more to the pile:

I bought these 24 books for £18 approximately. There were a few on the Mothers of the believers and the daughters of the Prophet (PBUH) which is an area I am passionate on, so I was happy to pick these up. I just have to prioritise time to read them now insh’Allah (and review them insh’Allah). They are currently all sitting on my husband’s bedside table and I don’t think he is going to find it as funny as I am going to find his reaction.

I also picked up this Palestinian olive oil from a fair trade company called Zaytoun, which I had heard about which I could not previously find locally. Dear Sis Rainbow, advised me last year that very good quality olive oil mixed with a small amount of black seed oil is great for the skin and particularly clearing blemishes so I intend to make myself a mix and use it on hair and skin insh’Allah.

I also managed to find the answer to my sugar cravings:

They were still full of beans by 7pm, until I turned my back long enough to wash some dishes and Gorgeous came up to me to show me his update to the haircut his Dad had taken him for this morning:

I wanted to scream, but just didn’t see the point, plus I had lost most of my voice. So I just explained gently he was in biiiiiiiiig trouble, some reeeeeaaaally biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggg trouble when his Daddy got home. That wiped the smile off his face. I think my quiet calm had the kids worried (not the reaction they were expecting) and they quietly got down to doing their homework. Little lady is great at helping Litle Man when he gets stuck.

I held Gorgeous, read him his bedtime story and put him in bed, he was out like a light, so his dad might get a surprise in the morning! Funny how now that it is time to get ready for tomorrow and start thinking about getting into bed, I have found my flow and concentration. I’m going to ignore the two loads of laundry on my bed to put away, the ones in the basket and the machine to put out and the things I have to iron for tomorrow. That’s if the iron works – there was foul stink emanating from it for the last two days until I clocked that the water inside it was slightly yellow. Little Man had poured juice into it. So I rinsed it out, but it is “temperamental” at the moment.

Instead I am going to write till hubby gets home and eat cherry cola bottles.


  1. lol great haircut! lucky he is a boy and it will even out, wonder if his dad thought anything was wrong with it? men can be so strange sometimes!

  2. Asalaamu Alaikum

    My daughter (6 yrs old) did this to my son's(4 yrs old) hair a few months ago. I'm happy to say it looks ok now. alhumdullilah. I was pretty upset too!

  3. Salams sis,
    I am amazed at how much you get done in a day. Anyway pls let me know if the black seed oil works for balding. Then I'll go hunting for some :)

  4. lol@that haircut...shame man...poor kid. Hopefully it will grow out soon:) Love those sweets and the olive oil btw!

  5. I am exactly the same...procratinate till the cows come home, and then find my flow at 11 p.m. It is a bad habit that dates back to my student days...then, I could just about cope with sleeping at 4 a.m (or not at all!!)...but now, with 4 kids, busy career and a house to run, not such a good idea.

    The only great thing about having a deadline is...a gleaming house and a diminished ironing!!

  6. Assalam-alaikam,

    Sis Aisha,
    his dad took one look and went mad. He is the one who has haircut duty, so he wasn't impressed when the haircut he paid for that morning was totally messed up. The little one is a bit sheepish at the moment...

    Sis C,
    Little Lady has done this to Little Man and he has also done this to himself, so I should be used to it by now. I'm glad your son's hair has grown out, it's just the period in between isn't it?

    Sis Sara,
    I will update on the blog insh'Allah if my friend reports back that it has helped her husband insh'Allah. Might give my dad some to try too and keep an eye on the results.

    Sis Blue Pearl,
    I know, shame, we are still teasing him about it, he keeps putting his hoodie up. The swees were good (all gone!), but the olive oil was wonderful, I loved the scent and I have been using it on my skin and the children's skin and hair. It sinks in ever so quick.

    Sis Anony,
    You've hit the nail on the head, it's the bad habits from student days that have partially carried on. Whats worse it's not just 11pm, it's always 11pm on a Sunday that I suddenly start getting all of the bright ideas in the world about clearing out cupboards and taking apart the contents of wardrobes.

  7. Salaams, you are fitting loads is! May I ask where your sisters circle is? and what kind of things you do there?

  8. Assalam-alaikam dear Sis Peaceful,

    I live in East London the circle usually happens at my house (though it rotates to a different sisters house in the area every few months). We usually read from a book called fazail-e-amaal for half the time (about the lives of the sahabah and the virtues of various good deeds to inspire us) and then one of the sisters will give a talk and give dawah to the group to strengthen their iman and give dawah to others. Contact me at the e-mail in my profile if you want to know where it is insh'Allah.

  9. Reading Fazaile Amaal: the controversial yet highly beneficial book, the book criticized for Zaeef (weak) Hadiths that has converted Zaeef Muslims or barely Muslims into pious ones, the book by one of the greatest Masters of Hadith in his time, blamed by Hadith-illiterates of containing unacceptable Hadiths. Difficult to imagine if the great old traditional Shaikhul Hadith Zakariya of the nondescript village of Kandhla (India) would have ever thought his book would be read by a working Londoner with stunning English skills!! He could certainly not read or speak English. Newspapers are not allowed in his madrasah Mazahiul Uloom, Saharanpur to this day. Perhaps, his sincerity and duaas were strong enough to pass through all these obstructions and barriers of continent, color, language and age!!

    May Allah reward and raise the status of the greater writer -- who died where his loved one lies (Madinah Al Munawwarah)!

    May Allah reward you and your sisters-in-circle too, immensely and hugely!

    Would like to know if you have heard of the objections on Fazaile Amaal and how you respond to them.

    For those looking for resources, this audio in Urdu discusses it. This booklet is a scholarly response, and Ahle Sunnah and Ahle Hadith: the Distance, the Difference is a modest attempt at the same.